Getting my husband to join in

Started 17 July 2025 · 19 replies · 180 hearts · read 3.7k times

TaaviTallinn, EE · 17 July 2025

about a year ago

Something I have been sitting with: Getting my husband to join in Not looking for advice so much as other people's experience.

Anyone else navigating this? I feel as though every piece of advice I read was written for someone with a completely different week.

I have read the guides here, which were more useful than anything else I have found, and I still have a question they do not cover.

What I would find most useful is not advice. It is somebody describing what their version of this was, and how long it went on for.

The thing that has surprised me most is how much of this is about other people rather than about me.

I will report back either way, because I have been helped by other people's follow-ups more than by their questions.

NadineLyon, FR

For what it is worth, the trial data on this is thinner than the confidence of the internet would suggest. Worth knowing when you read the posts.

RenFacilitatorBristol, UK

Gently: you have apologised three times in a post where you have done nothing that requires an apology.

BastianFreiburg, DE

What the opening post described happened to me too, in a slightly different order.

Yes to the burping. It is real, it is unbeautiful, and it does settle.

BaySt Ives, UK

I am about four months behind you and I have been dreading exactly this, so thank you for writing it down before I got there.

NkemPort Harcourt, NG

My pharmacist was more use than anyone. Ten minutes at the counter, no appointment, no charge.

BoWhitby, UK

Gently disagreeing with the reply above, or rather adding the other half of it.

Can I gently push back on one thing? Not the substance, just the framing — you have written twice that you should be coping better. Who told you that?

4me too 8

BronLincoln, UK

I keep a two-line diary and it is the only reason I could answer this question about myself. Worth starting even now.

LenaMunich, DE

No advice, just recognition. That sounds exhausting and I am sorry you are in it.

RonanBelfast, NI

What the reply above described happened to me too, in a slightly different order.

What helped was lowering my own expectations of the week rather than trying to hold the week together.

MaritGroningen, NL

#10

My experience was very boring, which I offer as data. Some of us just get a dull time of it.

BramGhent, BE

#11

It got worse before it got better for me, which I wish someone had said. About ten days of worse.

12me too 6

TabbyMargate, UK

#12

Building on what the reply above wrote rather than answering the original question.

Have you got anyone who can be with you when you do it? It made an enormous difference to me and I felt silly asking.

ClemmieNorwich, UK

#13

The thing that changed it for me was going slower, agreed with my prescriber. I am not suggesting you do that. I am saying the conversation exists.

BertrandToulouse, FR

#14

I did exactly the same and felt terrible about it. You have not done anything wrong.

TanviMumbai, IN

#15

Practical, boring answer: write the three questions down before you go in. I have never once remembered them otherwise.

AshwinBengaluru, IN

#16

Coming back to this a fortnight later to say it settled. Leaving the update because I hate reading threads that stop.

9me too 1

RufusGuildford, UK

#17

the reply above — yes, and the bit that took me longest to accept was the next part.

I am the person who had the frightening version of this. I went in, it was investigated, and it was not what anyone feared. Going in is the whole of my advice.

RenFacilitatorBristol, UK

#18

Noticing out loud that this conversation has drifted into comparison. That happens without anyone intending it and it does not help anyone. Let us come back to the person who asked.

NemoneLewes, UK

#19

the reply above said something I want to sit with for a second.

Please do not read the comments under news articles about this. I lost a fortnight to that.