Journal
Bel’s journal
Suburban, sensible, secretly struggling.
Steady
week 46fine energy 23 replies
Short one tonight. Steady. That is the whole entry. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. Better tomorrow, probably.
A different shape
week 44rested energy 24 replies
Slept through. Whole night, no waking. It has been so long that I lay there in the morning trying to work out what was different. The sleep has changed shape rather than…
Two flights of stairs
week 42quietly delighted energy 31 reply
Short one tonight. Tied my own laces standing up. I am aware of how that sounds and I do not care. Swam. First time since school. Two lengths, badly, grinning. Walked into…
Nothing to report
week 40flat energy 43 replies
A quiet week. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. Steady. That is the whole entry. Better tomorrow, probably.
She reduced it
week 38brisk energy 12 replies
A quiet week. Left with a printout I could not read and no idea what to be worried about. Taking it to bloodwork-buddies on Thursday. Took the diary in. She read it properly,…
Slept through
week 36tired energy 4
Short one tonight. Slept through. Whole night, no waking. It has been so long that I lay there in the morning trying to work out what was different. Sleep improved and…
An unremarkable week
week 36fine energy 33 replies
Steady. That is the whole entry. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. Better tomorrow, probably.
Stayed for the company
week 34warm energy 34 replies
The facilitator stopped the room when four of us were talking at once and asked one person how she was actually doing. It changed the whole hour. Somebody new tonight,…
Grip
week 31tired but good energy 52 replies
Grip strength has gone off and I noticed it opening a jar before I noticed it anywhere else. Back to loading properly. Walked instead of the bus all week. Not a programme.…
She noticed first
week 29held energy 34 replies
She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next month it will be the other way round. That is the whole mechanism. Nobody has ever asked me how I was doing on a Wednesday…
Quiet
week 27steady energy 43 replies
A quiet week. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. Steady. That is the whole entry. Better tomorrow, probably.
Where the pen lives
week 25organised energy 32 replies
Short one tonight. New sharps bin, and a plan for what happens to it when I move in September. Anchored injection day to my shift pattern rather than to the calendar, which…
The routine came apart
week 24low energy 53 replies
A quiet week. A hard week. I asked for help later than I should have and I am writing that down so I recognise it faster next time. A difficult February. Asked for help later…
Awake at four
week 23rested energy 54 replies
Slept through. Whole night, no waking. It has been so long that I lay there in the morning trying to work out what was different. The sleep has changed shape rather than…
She read the diary
week 21frustrated energy 22 replies
Late, and writing anyway. Took the diary in. She read it properly, which I had not expected, and changed the plan because of it. She reduced one of my other medications. I…
A wedding
week 19warm energy 21 reply
A quiet week. My mother cooks. That is how she says it. So I eat what I can, slowly, and I say thank you, and we manage. It is not a problem to be solved. Sunday lunch at my…
No news
week 17fine energy 13 replies
Steady. That is the whole entry. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. Better tomorrow, probably.
What is your secret
week 15warm energy 31 reply
Short one tonight. My mother cooks. That is how she says it. So I eat what I can, slowly, and I say thank you, and we manage. It is not a problem to be solved. Sunday lunch…
The list on the fridge
week 13steady energy 43 replies
A quiet week. I have found five things I can get down when nothing appeals and I have written them on the fridge. That list is the most useful thing I own. Protein first,…
We used to eat together
week 12tender energy 12 replies
Late, and writing anyway. He does the injection. I look at the wall. It is one of the more tender things in our life and I would not have predicted that. Told him. It went…