Journal
Sadie’s journal
Two jobs, one bike, no car.
Two years, no news
week 92content energy 12 replies
Wednesdays are just Wednesdays now. Steady. Nothing happened again. I am aware that is now the fourth month running I have written that, and I have decided it is the best…
A different shape
week 83rested energy 2
Ten minutes then I am asleep. The sleep has changed shape rather than improved. Different, not better, and I cannot yet tell whether I mind. Repeat study came back and the…
Steady
week 81flat energy 41 reply
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild…
Circle tonight
week 79warm energy 24 replies
Quickly, before bed. Circle tonight. Eight of us, an hour, and about eleven minutes of actual information. The rest was the point. The facilitator stopped the room when four…
She noticed first
week 77held energy 24 replies
Ten minutes then I am asleep. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next month it will be the other way round. That is the whole mechanism. Paired up. We text on…
Nothing to report
week 75fine energy 33 replies
Quiet. Injection Tuesday, mild Wednesday, fine by Thursday, and then a normal weekend. An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it…
How are you doing on a Wednesday
week 73held energy 44 replies
Nobody has ever asked me how I was doing on a Wednesday before. She had a bad week and I had a fine one, and next month it will be the other way round. That is the whole…
Sunday lunch
week 71warm energy 11 reply
Ten minutes then I am asleep. Sunday lunch at my grandmother's. Small plate, long afternoon, no drama, and she was happy. Somebody asked what my secret was and I froze…
She stopped the room
week 69warm energy 44 replies
Ten minutes then I am asleep. Went for the practical answers and stayed for the company, which I gather is what everybody does. Circle tonight. Eight of us, an hour, and…
Sunday night, four lines
week 67held energy 34 replies
Quickly, before bed. My buddy noticed something in my journal before I did and asked me a very gentle question about it. Nobody has ever asked me how I was doing on a…
Off the floor
week 65grateful energy 43 replies
Up the stairs at work twice without stopping at the landing. I stood at the top for a second like an idiot. Nobody saw. It counted. Tied my own laces standing up. I am aware…
Paired
week 63held energy 4
Ten minutes then I am asleep. Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five lines each, and it has quietly become the most reliable thing in my week. My buddy noticed…
An hour on the floor
week 62grateful energy 21 reply
Got down on the floor and back up again unaided. I have not been able to do that since 2021 and I did it twice more just to check. Cycled to Chorlton and back without…
The list on the fridge
week 62steady energy 53 replies
Ten minutes then I am asleep. Spread it across the day instead of trying to do it all at teatime and everything got easier. Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits of both. I…
Protein first
week 59steady energy 43 replies
Quickly, before bed. Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits of both. I have reached the limits of both. Was undereating without realising. The nurse asked a plain question about…
An unremarkable week
week 58flat energy 21 reply
Quickly, before bed. An unremarkable week. Ate, walked, worked, slept adequately. This is what most of it looks like. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory…
Slept through
week 56foggy energy 34 replies
The sleep has changed shape rather than improved. Different, not better, and I cannot yet tell whether I mind. Repeat study came back and the apnoea is much reduced. Ten…
A new bin and a plan
week 53organised energy 12 replies
Small logistics win: worked out where the pen actually lives in a fridge shared with four other people and a toddler's yoghurts. Two lines a day in a paper diary. Date, and…
Somebody new
week 51warm energy 14 replies
Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land. Went for the practical answers and stayed…
Eight minutes and a chair
week 49tired but good energy 1
Ten minutes then I am asleep. Kept the two sessions that matter and dropped the two that were vanity. Fewer, heavier, done. Eight minutes and a chair. That is the whole…