Journal
Salma’s journal
Steady is my whole personality now.
Across the day
week 34steady energy 23 replies
A gentle week, mostly. Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits of both. I have reached the limits of both. Got something with protein in before nine this morning, which meant the…
A wedding
week 32warm energy 21 reply
A gentle week, mostly. Sunday lunch at my grandmother's. Small plate, long afternoon, no drama, and she was happy. Starters as a main course, permanently. No explanation…
An unremarkable week
week 31flat energy 43 replies
No news. The dog is well, the weather has been foul, and I have taken my medication on the correct day for the eleventh week running. Nothing to report. Writing it down…
Where the pen lives
week 29organised energy 52 replies
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Two lines a day in a paper diary. Date, and one thing. That is the entire system and it has twice changed a clinical decision. Tested…
Dreams
week 28foggy energy 54 replies
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. Vivid dreams, every night, the sort you have to sit…
Stayed for the company
week 27steadied energy 31 reply
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Circle tonight. Eight of us, an hour, and about eleven minutes of actual information. The rest was the point. Somebody new tonight,…
Circle tonight
week 26warm energy 52 replies
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land.…
She stopped the room
week 25warm energy 5
Circle tonight. Eight of us, an hour, and about eleven minutes of actual information. The rest was the point. Joined the recovery-aware circle and found the rules a relief.…
Before nine
week 24steady energy 43 replies
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Got something with protein in before nine this morning, which meant the rest of the day did not fall apart at four. Greek yoghurt,…
Sunday night, four lines
week 23held energy 24 replies
A gentle week, mostly. My buddy noticed something in my journal before I did and asked me a very gentle question about it. Paired up. We text on Sunday nights, four or five…
I nearly did not write
week 21flat energy 53 replies
A gentle week, mostly. Nothing to report. Writing it down anyway, on the theory that a journal made only of eventful weeks would give a false impression of the whole thing.…
A different shape
week 19rested energy 54 replies
A gentle week, mostly. Waking at four again. Not anxious, just awake, lying there listening to the boiler. Vivid dreams, every night, the sort you have to sit up and shake…
Somebody new
week 18warm energy 34 replies
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Somebody new tonight, terrified, exactly where I was in the spring. I said the thing that had been said to me and watched it land.…
Back without making it up
week 17tired but good energy 22 replies
Grip strength has gone off and I noticed it opening a jar before I noticed it anywhere else. Back to loading properly. Walked instead of the bus all week. Not a programme.…
A plain question
week 15steady energy 53 replies
Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits of both. I have reached the limits of both. Got something with protein in before nine this morning, which meant the rest of the day did…
It is coming back
week 14quiet energy 51 reply
A gentle week, mostly. The hum is back, quieter. I panicked when it started returning and Jonah pointed out, mildly, that nobody had promised it was permanent. The quiet is…
What was underneath
week 12thoughtful energy 14 replies
Sitting down to this properly tonight. The quiet is not the same as peace. It has left a space, and the space has other things in it that I had been keeping the noise on top…
Flat, whole night
week 12pleased energy 31 reply
Sitting down to this properly tonight. Carried both bags up in one go. Small thing. Wrote it down. Walked into town and back, which I stopped doing years ago without ever…
Across the day
week 11steady energy 53 replies
A gentle week, mostly. Got something with protein in before nine this morning, which meant the rest of the day did not fall apart at four. Greek yoghurt, eggs, and the limits…
Into town and back
week 9pleased energy 41 reply
Up the stairs at work twice without stopping at the landing. I stood at the top for a second like an idiot. Nobody saw. It counted. Full shift on my feet and my knees did not…